Does it sometimes feel like you aren’t able to tell others what you actually feel? You don’t agree to someone’s point but you are hesitating to tell them. Or does it seem difficult to you to break ice when you are with strangers? You are bound to follow others because you aren’t confident to speak for yourself?
Don’t worry I am not a mind reader to tell all your problems. The fact is, these are so common problems that most people face mainly due to lack of confidence. That’s not to say learning how to be more confident will solve all your problems. Everyone has bad days or moments that upset them. Being confident also doesn’t mean you’re completely sure of yourself at all times. Creating confidence is not about knowing it all; it’s about trusting that no matter what happens in a particular situation, you’ll be able to handle it and learn from the outcome.
So, as evident the agenda of this post is to tell you some practical ways to become more confident in life.
7 Tips to Become More Confident:
1. Shed off Your limits
As children we think we can conquer the world, but somewhere between childhood and adulthood, our enthusiasm and natural inclinations to dream big are squashed. Parents and teachers start imposing their own beliefs—about what we can and can’t do in life—upon us.
To truly learn how to be confident, you need to love yourself first. When you practice self-love, you’ll have confidence no matter what happens in life, because that confidence will come from within.
Limiting yourself about who you are and what you can do leads to self-sabotage and reinforcement of these beliefs – and overcoming them is the first step to total confidence.
2. Work on your Body language
Physiology is key when learning how to be confident and mastering the body language of confidence can put you on the path to success. Think about someone you know whom you consider extremely confident. When you first met them, you probably knew they were confident before they even started speaking. You knew they were self-assured because of the way they carried themselves and moved.
They made eye contact, shook your hand firmly and stood up straight. Now do a quick inventory of your body. What’s your posture like? How are you breathing? We all get in negative states, which can lead to slouching, shallow breathing or hanging your head. You have the power to change how you’re feeling by controlling the way your body moves and the way you present yourself.
So start from now, work on your body language, see how confident people around you walk, talk and behave. Observation is a good way to build a confident body language. Get this thing right and you are already half-way through.
Read Also: How to Beat Procrastination Effectively?
3. Improvise your communication skills
How do you know that someone is confident? Well, they talk confidently and with assertion, without stammering and contradicting themselves.
Communication is a great tool. When you can put forth your views and ideas clearly, you ought to be confident automatically. Therefore to be confident you need not practice a confident body language only, you also have to try and get a hold of the conversational skills.
A good conversationalist can never be under confident neither overconfident. When you speak, speak with assertion. Don’t stammer every now and then. However, assertion does not mean that you behave as if you and only you know everything. Be polite and humble and yet assertive.
4. Stop Comparing Yourself to Others
Whether you compare how you look to your friends on Facebook or you compare your salary to your friend’s income, comparisons aren’t healthy. In fact, a 2018 study published in Personality and Individual Differences found a direct link between envy and the way you feel about yourself.
Researchers found that people who compared themselves to others experienced envy. And the more envy they experienced, the worse they felt about themselves.
If you’re feeling envious of someone else’s life, remind yourself of your own strengths and successes. Consider keeping an ongoing gratitude journal to help you focus on your own life and not the lives of others.
When you notice you are drawing comparisons, remind yourself that doing so isn’t helpful. Everyone is running their own race and life isn’t a competition.
5. Be True to Yourself
One of the surest ways to lose confidence is try to be someone else. One of the best ways to build your confidence? Be true to yourself.
When you’re trying to be someone you’re not, every part of you resists it. You are not everyone else. You are you. And the more you can understand who you are and what you value the stronger you will be.
When you stray away from who you are, you lose confidence because it’s ‘just not you’.
Think about what makes you, uniquely you. Write it down. Think about what you value and what’s important to you. Write that down, too.
6. Build up skills and knowledge
Knowledge and skills really make a difference to your confidence. For example, if someone asks me to talk about Chronic Focal Encephalitis, something I haven’t even heard before ( infact I had to google it just to write it’s name), how in the world am I supposed to be confident?
This example puts forth a very important point, if you know about something, you can actually be confident because you know what it is,l how it works or any other aspect. On the other hand, if you are low in skills and knowledge, no matter how confident you believe you are, its almost destined for you to fall.
Clearly speaking, the thing I want to tell is that you must read about things, maybe if not much then just about trending thing, learn new and in demand skills and become as resourceful as you can. All this will boost your confidence immensely.
7. Fake It ‘Til You Make It’
Here’s one of the most commonly used pieces of advice related to confidence. The idea is that you don’t have to feel confident on the inside, as long as you can appear confident. This should, in theory, set the stage for the development of real, deeply-felt confidence. At some point, we’ll stop faking it, even without realizing it.
Well honestly speaking, I don’t really support this concept of faking confidence. This is so because when you try to fake confidence, most of the times you end up bluffing and being overconfident.
Faking it only works in moderation, and it has some potential risks too. Trying to project an image of success and unshakable confidence can backfire and cause you to dwell on your mistakes.
However, research has shown that appearances count a great deal, and exuding confidence can help us rise to the top of a group, especially if we make a great first impression. This, in turn, inspires real confidence to grow.
Increased confidence improves our chances of happiness in life. It can smooth our way into striking better financial deals, advancing at work, and finding romance or friendship. When we approach others with a strong sense of our worth, relationships of all kinds will flourish.
Try to build resilience first, and confidence will come. Work on your strengths; make sure you get the right feedback from the right people.
With time, you will develop a positive feedback loop: your success will fuel your confidence and vice versa.